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Brain Food for the Good Life

How I Live: Are the Best Things in Life really Free?

  NATURAL QUIET AND SIMPLICITY INSPIRE ACTIVE INVOLVEMENT August 2020 At midlife, I had been building and launching both my family and my career for over 20 years.  I was stressed out from trying to make ends meet.  My business supported employees and counselors, but during its last years, I reached a point where I couldn’t make ends meet, so we went under.  When I had fulfilled all my obligations, …Read More

Communities and Wisdom Streams

MY FIVE COMMUNITIES AND WISDOM STREAMS 1.  Christian faith and biblical wisdom — I have enjoyed 35 years in two local congregations, the Disciples of Christ into which I maried, and the Presbyterian church in which I was raised as a fifth generation member.   I served both as a teacher, elder, pulpit search committee member, and chairmain of the Personnel committee.  I have taught at the Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, …Read More

What Might Healthy Drinking Look Like?

  ARE THERE HEALTHY WAYS TO DRINK ALCOHOL?   Researchers keep finding that those whose alcohol consumption is one glass of red wine most days, and only that, have a longer lifespan due to fewer heart problems.  I find that interesting. I wonder if it’s the little bit of wine that helps the heart, or maybe something else, or maybe both.  I imagine the people who can drink that way …Read More

Selfish Grandparent, or Healthy?

ARE YOU SELFISH AS A GRANDPARENT? by Dr. Paul Schmidt             A client recently shared with me a very helpful sermon he had heard from his pastor, Brian Tome at Crossroads Church in Lexington.  It helped me as a grandparent, and it made me think about the various styles of grandparenting I have heard described in my office.             The sermon contrasted five ways to distinguish a patriarch grandfather from …Read More

Romans 14 on What is Clean

  Romans 14 as Applied to Marital Lovemaking   Let’s say that one of us wants to do something together sexually that our partner considers dirty or gross.  This does not apply to behaviors that are unsafe, painful, forceful, or degrading (such as spanking, vulgarities, or verbal insults).  If one of us has prayed about it and believes this activity is a gift from God to us both, the other …Read More

Genuine Intimacy in Marriage and Faith

Genuine Intimacy in Marriage and Faith The simultaneous experience of vulnerability and safety is not found exclusively in marriage.  The apostle Paul felt that people could be closer to God and to those they loved if they were not burdened with a spouse and children at home (see his extremely personal confession in the entire seventh chapter of his first letter to the Corinthians).  There is obvious truth in this, …Read More

Is this sexual activity dirty for us?

  Applying Romans 14 to Marital Lovemaking   Spiritually, most Christians consider romantic touch a matter of individual conscience.  The Bible doesn’t give one set of behavioral guidelines here for everybody, so the principles of Romans 14 should certainly apply.  Let’s each read this chapter devotionally, letting it and God read us as we do.  To see how it applies to our romantic touching, we would need to try replacing …Read More

A Most Effective Sobriety Plan

Four Circles            A new approach to establsihing and maintaining sobriety has emerged from the most effective treatment centers in recent years.  It is a direct application of the 12 steps of AA, and it is a great way to measure your risk at any given time, and to report to someone else how you are doing.  It works if you work it.  Four concentric circles …Read More

Porn Abuse in Teens

Pornography Abuse in Teenagers: How Parents can Understand and Reverse It   America’s surgeon general has agreed with the consensus of research:   9 out of every 10 young people will be exposed to Internet pornography before they reach age 18.   Quarantine assumes you are more savvy with technology than your teen, which is highly doubtful.  So quarantine needs to be strengthened by inoculation, so that using both becomes the best …Read More