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Marijuana

Marijuana:  Thoughts on its Use, Abuse, and Legalization I have never really had a position or opinion on marijuana, and in recent weeks I have grown weary of this ignorance. To prepare my thoughts on this subject, I have done three things. First, I have obtained professional training as a certified addictions specialist from the International Institute for Addiction and Trauma Professionals. Secondly I have spent several hours looking through …Read More

Alcoholism

I. What is alcoholism? A. Chronic, progressive, incurable, fatal disease that is characterized by loss of control over alcohol and other sedatives. 1. Chronic—you’ve had the problem for a little while. 2. Progressive– Grows on you; gets worse; going to take more alcohol to get a good buzz. 3. Incurable– Always going to have it; after years of recovery; even after you stop the temptation will always be there. 4. Fatal– Does kill …Read More

How to Work a Good 12-Step Program

What exactly is a 12-step program?  It is the people, principles, prayers, and lifestyle practices of recovery from addiction that was started by Alcoholics Anonymous back in the 1930’s.  To work a program successfully, you need all four—the people, principles, prayers, and practices.  You can’t just read and learn at home, just go to meetings and call your sponsor, just ask God to take away the desire to act out, …Read More

Is it a Bad Habit, Sin, Disease, or Addiction

  IS IT A BAD HABIT, SIN, DISEASE, OR ADDICTION?  At most big family gatherings, there will be an alcoholic, a nicotine user, or a drug abuser present. The table likely plays host as well to a few non-chemical bad habits that also threaten the family. Nearly every family has folks who have an eating, work, video game, pornography, sex, gambling, hoarding, or spending disorder. Some may also have abusive …Read More

Triangles Can Help or Hurt Communication

Sometimes when we want to talk with someone, we assume they wouldn’t understand, or worse still, wouldn’t listen. Maybe they’d even fire back some criticism at the messenger so they didn’t have to deal with the message. So we send our message through a third party. This is called a ricochet message, or a bank shot, but these terms imply it just happens once. Usually messages keep coming this way, …Read More

Vampires and Zombies: How People Suck the Life Out of Each Other

Have you ever wondered why vampires and zombies have become so popular in American culture?   I believe it is caused by the huge rise of addictions in America, and by so many parents over-protecting and over-indulging their children.  Both of these trends have produced people whose lives resemble vampires and zombies on the inside, because they love in dependent ways. When children see their parents overly involved with each other, or with …Read More

Codependent Enabling: Stages of Decline

People trying to save or help their addicted loved ones are in a similar position to a pastor trying to save his congregation from sin. They often use similar tactics. After a time of this helping, the addict comes to resent the reforming efforts of the loved one, who is after all supposed to be his parent or spouse, not his counselor, sponsor, or pastor. The helping loved one begins …Read More

Sex Addiction: Online Help

The “word of God” can also be found in Christian writings for the perpetrators and victims of sexual sin.  Though not specifically Christian, Pat Carnes bases his hope on the Biblically inspired 12-step program.  Doug Weiss, Mark Laaser and Harry Schaumburg are Biblically oriented Christian psychologists who are themselves recovering from sex addiction.  They show how sexual infidelity and pornography are twisted perversions of our spiritual hunger for God.  Help Online: www.sexhelp.com – Great source of information, research, and on-line tests to learn about yourself …Read More

Four Circles

  Four-Circle Sobriety Plan          Four concentric circles represent three important lists of behaviors, and one list of warning signs. These lists will be fluid, and you will need to add and subtract new items on a regular basis, at least from the boundaries list and the recovery behaviors below.   Use these lists to structure and summarize your reports to people of how you have been doing, in the order …Read More

Four Core False Beliefs of Sexual Addiction

Below are four lies your addiction will keep trying to get you to believe.  They are discussed in several of Dr. Patrick Carnes’ books.  In order to train your brain to think differently, make your own copy of this document, and add after each one ideas that will counteract them.  Unbold the lie, and leave the healthy ideas in bold face.  For each healthy idea, cite your source (authority).  Carry a copy of this with you …Read More