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Working with me

For people in bondage to painful emotions, habits, and relationships, I am a powerfully liberating counselor. I guide and encourage healthier involvement with five communities in which I live -- Christian faith, social sciences, 12-step recovery, the common sense of family and friends, and the natural world God created. These five wisdom streams all call and empower me to be a warrior in a spiritual war, fighting against lies, fear, hate, shame, and addiction, by helping you live with more wisdom, courage, hope, love, joy, and peace.

Counseling & Life Coaching

Individual counseling is scheduled to suit your calendar and budget. I work quickly by being solution-focused, homework-intensive, and diagnostically sharp. Life coaching does not look into buried memories, thoughts, or feelings, but simply finds the methods and motivation to achieve your future goals.

Recovery from Addictions and Infidelity

We discover what your addiction/love affair was doing for you, and find more constructive ways to meet these needs. I help you reprogram your brain so it doesn’t keep making the same mistakes. I am internationally certified with excellent training for treating addictions and the traumatic losses of marital betrayal.

Sex Addiction, Testing, Marital and Family Counseling

My primary specialty is treating male sex addicts and/or their wives. Research has proven my approach to be successful. Family and Marriage Counseling: I have been trained for this by Drs. John and Julie Gottman, widely regarded as our nation’s best. Testing: I have many tools for helping us to understand you better.

From the Blog


Love, Marriage and Family Relationships

From clinical research, my professional training, my traditional and biblical values, and from my own personal experience, I know a great deal about healthy love for relationships. I am an expert on single adult dating, and have written a book about this. Marital partnership and romantic intimacy have been passions of mine all my life. I have a large local extended family that celebrates differences together in harmony.

Managing Anxiety, Anger and Depression

I have a variety of techniques I use in the office and homework assignments I give outside the office that are effective in teaching successful, adaptive ways of managing painful emotions. I believe emotions need to be talked out so they are not acted out. In guiding and motivating our behavior, we should believe our beliefs, and feel our feelings.

Addictions: Recovery and Enabling

I have been recovering for over 30 years from an addiction to alcohol, and from my naïve and tragic efforts to fix my loved ones. My recovery did not stop with some variety, but has continued to bless me with serenity, courage and wisdom. I have learned a great deal from working my own 12-step recovery program during these years, and from the counseling I have received to help establish and maintain my recovery period.

Pornography, Infidelity, and Sexual Addiction

My post-doctoral training in treating trauma and addictions has taught me that this culture is rapidly producing epidemic levels of addiction to pornographic and maritally unfaithful behaviors. My shock and dismay that all this is even happening in Christian homes with good marriages has given way to understanding, and I am now armed with the very best methods available for turning these tragic situations around.

Life Coaching and Personal Growth

I love it when my clients or their friends and family come to me to make a good life better. Life coaching does not focus on negative feelings about past failures, but on hopes and efforts toward future goals. It is hard to find role models for the well-balanced life these days, but I have plenty of them. For years I have compiled what I called Brain Food for the Good Life, and you can find them here in my blog, especially in the section on Personal Growth.

Proverbs next prev

  • To know God's will, use prayer, scripture, good teaching, and wise counsel, but also become a fruit inspector. Discern what will bring the most fruits of the Spirit to the most people, and the least fruits of the flesh.

    Dr. Paul F. Schmidt

  • When you've taken something from someone, especially a fruit of the spirit, try to give it back and then some.

    Dr. Paul F. Schmidt

  • The more you give of spiritual things, good or bad, the more you have, and the more you want.

    Dr. Paul F. Schmidt

Make your appointment today!

I see people in Louisville/Middletown on Tuesdays and Thursdays and Lexington on Wednesdays, 7:30 to 5:30. On Mondays and Fridays I see people who can’t make the other days.